I’m no longer Michelle. I’m no longer a person. I’m no longer your friend, your co-worker, your relative. I’m just a science experiment. I’m an incubator of life. I have a person growing inside of me. Once it’s out, maybe I can return to me again. But for now, well, you decide.

I really don’t feel like “me” anymore. Both from how I’m treated, to how I look, to how I feel. People don’t look at me and see Michelle. They look at me and see a belly, a baby, a life. Sure they ask “how are you feeling” but what they really mean is, are you giving this baby a good start, is she going to be ok when she comes out or will there be complications. They don’t look at me and see Michelle, they look at me and say, “WOAH look at that belly, you’re huge!” I look in the mirror and I don’t see Michelle, I see that same huge belly staring back at me. I walk up some stairs, around a store, hell, even just to my car, and I don’t FEEL like me. I’m out of breathe, I’m tired, my back and legs hurt. I’m not me! I’m an incubator of life.

People ask how much sleep I get, what kind of foods I eat, if I have any weird cravings, if she moves a lot, how much weight I’ve gained, etc, etc, etc. See, I’m just everyones little science experiment. They’re testing the waters before they find out for themselves what it’s like.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining at all about being pregnant. I love it. I’m not complaining at all about what I’m going through or the attention I get, I love it. Just pointing out the fact that I just don’t feel like me, and sometimes people don’t treat me like me, like they used to. I’m just a big fat science experiment walking around for all to see!…    

…But I wouldn’t change it for the world!

Have you ever had such a busy weekend that you say, I need a vacation!!- that just wasn’t long enough and I had no time to rest!? Well folks… I’m going to get my wish! I’m going on Vacation tomorrow! YEA! Not before putting in some major work today on a busy busy day…

This weekend I feel like I didn’t stop. We went to the mall- what a nightmare that was! I get a little anxious in crowds sometimes and people down here in S. FL are SOOOO RUDE! Much more then any other place I’ve ever been. It’s a huge mall too, always busy. We had lunch out at a resturant (because the foodcourt was a ZOO), which never happens, we’re poor! (we had a gift certificate lol) Well, we did rest for a little to watch 2 of the “Left Behind” series movies with Kirk Cameron. Then… we set up the Christmas stuff!! EARLY I KNOW! But C wanted to set it up this weekend so it would already be set up when we returned from our vacation. We usually set it up right after Thanksgiving or Dec 1st, and we wont be getting home until Dec 2nd, a Tuesday, so most likely wouldn’t set it up til the next weekend. So, I humored him and agreed to set everything up. And I’m glad I did becuase it did put me in a rather cheery mood!  So that was all just Saturday! Sunday I was slow moving because I couldn’t sleep Saturday night. We stayed up way too late setting up the decorations and I was up early as usual. We had to finish setting up the decorations we didn’t get a chance the night before. Then I painted the dresser knobs!! What a process. First I had to paint them white, 2 coats. And then I practiced what I was going to paint on paper before I tried it on the knobs. It’s for the babys room so I was painting within our Frog and Duck theme. I thought about doing some butterflies and dragonflies too, but I was having fun with the frogs so I did 4 frogs and 4 ducks… to actually paint on the knobs it took me 4 hours!! that is not including all that prep time! Crazy. But I think they turned out rather well if I do say so myself!!

After the painting and brief break, I had to go to the store and then I tried to pack after dinner. I pulled out all my winter clothes about a month ago to see what would fit me over my pregnant belly! Well, it has grown conciderably since then so I had to re-try everything on and I could only fit into 1/2 of what I previously took out!! fun stuff… so instead of having things to chose from, I have just enough to last me the 8 days we’ll be in Michigan! And that includes the dress clothes I wear to work lol so i can’t be casual the whole time… owell… And that was my weekend, it’s usually not so event filled, and that was after a busy busy week. Normally during the week I dont do much after work, but Tues-Thurs I wasn’t home at night. I’m just glad I have the next week off work! It will be SOOO NICE!

 

(pictures coming soon)

I am a BIG FATSO today! so not only did i finish my piece of cheesecake… one of my co-workers brought me back a frosty from Wendys!! My stomach feels like it’s stretched to the max, not to mention the big sugar rush I’m going to get in a bit… haha. (PS don’t forget Im pregnant, its the baby craving this stuff, I swear! hahaha)

Let me explain the cheesecake though, because maybe it won’t be as bad as it seems to me… My boss brought me back a piece of cheesecake from the lunch she went on, on Wednesday. it was from Champp’s Have you ever eaten their dessert?? They are HUGE pieces of cake! So it took me 3 days to finish it off… I ate a lot of it on Wednesday, had almost the rest on Thursday and just polished it off today. So when you think about it, it’s not THAT bad, right?? I think I’m just trying to make myself feel better here LOL.  I think the deliciousness of it is making me feel guilty. Because you know everything that is REALLY good, is always REALLY bad for you!  Here is the description:

Turtle Cheesecake
A slice of rich New York cheesecake topped with chopped pecans, whipped cream and dripping with decadent caramel and fudge sauces.

They didnt have a picture of it on their website, but i found one somewhat similar, but the size of the one I had is at least twice as big…if not 3 times…

 

Is your mouth watering???

I’m so excited, it’s so nice to have great friends! My friend Ria gave me some of her “fat clothes” as she calls them when my baby bump was beginning to show and I couldn’t fit into my regular work pants. But now I have outgrown those! And I got a whole bunch of maternity clothes today! They are SO expensive btw. I went shopping this weekend to pick up a few things, spent a ton! and it was really hard to do because my husband just got laid off!! But I didn’t fit into anything so I had to! So these new clothes will really come in handy. YEA!

She gave me a really nice dress that will be great for the holidays, its red with a black overlay. And then 2 pair of work pants, black and gray, 2 casual capris, about 6 shirts- including one really great one that is black/white/gray striped its my favorite- and she gave me 3 long skirts-brown black and gray, that aren’t maternity, but if you pull them up over the belly they fit lol skirts are actually pretty great.

anyone else want to donate to the poor, send clothes my way! LOL

I just bought my first piece of maternity clothing! Until now I’ve been making due with what I have. I was lucky enough to borrow some bigger size dress pants from a friend to hold me over in that department! But Jeans… forget it, don’t fit at all! I already missed one jeans day at work and don’t want to miss another (plus the proceeds for this jeans fee go towards breast and colon cancer research so I just have to participate!) So I shopped online to find prices ranges at certain stores first, and then scoured the mall. This is going to be more difficult than I thought, because I’m so short! I have to buy petites and you just can’t find them everywhere when they don’t have a big maternity section (guess I’ll have to shop online going forward for a bigger selection). But I found a pair, at a decent price, at Motherhood Maternity. It’s kind of a small store in the mall closest to me, but these are kind of perfect. The band at the top is actually kind of comfortable with the maternal it’s made of- more comfortable than the first pair I tried on. I don’t know about you, but this was the first time I ever tried on maternity clothes! It was kind of weird! LOL. and of course, being the photography freak that I am!, I had to have my husband take a pic of my first maternity purchase! The first is the band folded down (which can actually be folded a little lower, I didn’t realize I has it up so high!) and then the alternate view is pulled up to go over the baby bump